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Hi from a newbie
Moderators: DeaconStreet, nickomsk, TonyH, Chris

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   Russian Relationships -> IntroductionsMessage format
Posted 2013-05-31 12:25 AM (#57829)
Subject: Hi from a newbie


Posts: 7

Hi I'm 44 and maybe a bit long in the tooth for starting long distance relationships but I met a simply outstanding Russian lady from St Petersburg last month. We both met on a regular dating site (not one of these Russian bride jobbies) and after a week we met in Helsinki for a weekend. I can't believe I even did that, I usually groan about having to travel more than 20 miles to meet a date, let alone 1000!! But we did and we hit it off big time

She's 40 and teaches English at a secondary school, single, no kids, rents an apartment. I'm going to head over to St Petersburg next week for 7 days to stay with her. My financial situation isn't great at the moment and she has even offered to pay - which naturally I could never accept. It's just a temporary 'blip' in my circumstances but it is reassuring all the same.

We spend most days video chatting on skype and it seems like the distance builds a bond that is very unique, unlike other relationships, we are really getting to know each other _ I can't wait to speak to her, this is coming from a guy that could best be described as being 'detached' by previous girlfriends :-\

Anyway - I digress. I'm sure many of you (I hope) have similar relationships and can identify with my story. Our conversations recently have been about exploring the options of being together. She has been to the UK before on education visits and has started looking at job opportunities with visa sponsorship - that has hit a dead-end real fast - surprise surprise. So already we are both thinking about the marriage option - whoa!!!

Please don't get me wrong, I would love to marry her (ok new relationship - head-over heels and all that) but I would want to marry someone for the right reasons, not as a means to apply for a long-term visa.

Anyway, we are getting ahead of ourselves and I have written a very long intro. The question however I would like to ask you all is given your collective wisdom, what would you say would be the best strategy to be able to live together in the UK? How would you do it, knowing what you know now?



Posted 2013-05-31 12:36 PM (#57830 - in reply to #57829)
Subject: Re: Hi from a newbie


Posts: 4164
Location: London
Hello and welcome to the forum.
The short answer to your question about living together in the UK is quite simple. Marriage.
There isn't an option available for just living together as far as settlement visas go.
You probably already realise that a relationship with a person of visa nationality, ie someone who requires a visa to enter the UK, is not a simple affair.
The best advice that I can offer you, and I think most of the members will agree, is to begin with getting your lady here on a visitor visa for a short-ish holiday, maybe two or three weeks to start with. A visitor visa is usually issued for six months and allows multiple visits within that time. However, it isn't designed for a six month visit. Although some people think it's OK to use it for getting their partners here to live together, you would be treading on dangerous ground with the UKBA, and subsequent visa applications would almost certainly be refused if they thought that a visitor visa had been used as a short term settlement visa.
The road to settlement in the UK is long and expensive, and it is getting harder and more expensive all the time.
But the only way to achieve settlement is marriage, or a civil partnership.

Good luck with everything.
Posted 2013-05-31 6:00 PM (#57835 - in reply to #57829)
Subject: Re: Hi from a newbie


Posts: 7

Thanks for the response Malcolm, so lots of short visits and build up a nice relationship. She has already been to the UK before and certainly won't be abusing the system by coming over for 6 months - besides she has a job and bills to pay like the rest of us :-/

So I guess its a case of seeing where we go and possibly getting married in Russia and coming over with some sort of spouse visa.


Posted 2013-06-01 7:42 AM (#57838 - in reply to #57835)
Subject: Re: Hi from a newbie


Posts: 2538
Location: When at home either Sakhalin Island or Scotland

For Starters I will second Malcolm's welcome.


As a another point there is nothing is really worth adding to the advice that you have been given by Malcolm.

Apart from saying good luck with your relationship.


I will just state that although there are many hurdles in-front of you in my view the hurdles can be minimised.

"Do it right and you will get it right"


Posted 2017-01-28 11:38 AM (#88883 - in reply to #57829)
Subject: Re: Hi from a newbie
New User

Posts: 1

Location: Delhi
Hello Im new here,
Looking awsume to see this nice information.
thanks alot...
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